A Beautiful Dream
We all have d---ed dreams, and I think I'm coming to terms with that. I don't expect to find everything in life that I wish for. Maybe I can be happy with far less. But for the record, here is a rough outline of that kind of person that I think would make a good life-partner:
- Is exceptionally thrifty. Sees most spending through an "investment" lens.
- Exercises, eats healthy, and is healthy -- being young is a plus, but healthy habits are worth at least a few years.
- Healthy habits are not only enjoyed, but are bolstered by a powerful force of will against tempting unhealthy habits.
- Is mentally sound, with a generally positive encouraging attitude. Can be very weird but not to the point of instability.
- Wants kids, and sees child rearing as an opportunity rather than slave labor.
- Has some kind of exceptionally strong skills, for example fast advancement in a challenging career or sweet artistic skills or dazzling home-making skills.
- Has lots of energy and intensity about accomplishing whatever is the project of the moment.
- Is gregarious, and likes opening the home for friends.
posted by My Freakwentness at 6:34 AM
10 Comments:
This is NOT unrealistic.
That said, a few comments from my experience...
What you have to offer is a good starting point. But chance, timing, fate, God, has a lot to do with what happens. These are factors that you cannot control - so don't be saddened by the wait.
Two, if you want someone who is advancing in his or her career, it is very likely that they will be in some sort of debt. What you have done is admirable, but incredibly rare. Money is the #1 thing couples fight about most, so it's good that you recognize how important it is to you!
Please, who is this Rose McDougall?
How ironic, "Anonymous" asking "who is ..."
I am sooo glad I am out of the game (not to mention that I am your sister) because I would totally bomb those qualifications. Good luck!
Dear Sister, I beg to disagree. As far as I can tell, you seem to easily meet most of them and come reasonably close on the rest. But as you mentioned, we ARE siblings ...
the exceptionally thrifty thing is the stumbling block.
on the other hand, maybe you can find someone like Mavis.
There is no question that the percentage of people who fill this description is pretty small, maybe less than 5%. In certain sub-populations, a much higher portion qualifies; maybe a quarter of female professors, for example. But the thriftiness requirement is maybe the biggest axe. Among Mennonites and Lutherans, thriftiness at a level compatible with me might be practiced by about 20 - 30% of the population. Unfortunately, much of the thriftiness is related to poverty, which might correlate somewhat negatively with other nice qualities.
I need one thing clarified (not that I'm contending for the position, as I'm way old [even my healthy habits couldn't remediate my ancientness] and long married, but just in case I would know of someone to suggest): Under point number two, I assume that "eats healthy" means "eats healthy food" and not "eats healthily"(which could just mean she eats very vigorously)
kbs
hmmm ... i don't necessarily see anything wrong with eating vigorously, but i would define "eating healthy" as putting healthy foods into one's self (in a fairly standard way) in quantities that Jesus would approve of.
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